insomnia strikes again

I highly doubt this will interest anyone so do both of us a favor and please stop while your ahead.

Once again its late and im still wide awake. Only difference this time around is that its not dance or video games or blogs keeping me up. The past couple days have been very different. Not it terms of the events that have been happening, but more along the lines of the way ive been feeling about my life. Honestly I have no idea where im going with this, but with so much on my mind and no way to effectively communicate it, I cant help but to write things down. Maybe itll help me later or maybe it will just put things into perspective. Recent experiences, situations, and feelings, have got me thinking a little too much. All emo ness aside, I haven’t been truly happy in a while. Things happen and im able to take my mind off the bad, but only long enough to get me by. Although I find my problems almost unexplainable, I cant help but to question myself into feeling this way. Why do I feel this way? Why am I scared? Why are things the way they are? Why do I allow them to be that way? Why haven’t I done what it takes to get things the way I want them to be? In my opinion ive fallen short of many things I have envisioned for myself as a whole. I can look back and see the good I have done, but I still question if even my greatest accomplishments are enough to make me feel ok. This uneasy feeling is making it hard for me to strive and do things that I really want to do. Not simple things that deal with short and long term goals, but the things that I really, really want to do. Things that I know are not the best for the situations im in, but the things that I think will make me happy. I take that back maybe doing these things will make me happy and it is these things I need to do the get me back on track. I really hope that its the coming of this new year that has got me all bugged out. If that is the case then i know what I have to do and how I have to do it. A fresh start is less than 24 hours away. 2010 will be the start of a new lifestyle that will bring me closer to the bar I know I am capable of. I guess its time to stop asking why and start asking why not in the opposite direction. I need a positive out look to motivate me during this difficult time. Im only going to get there by pushing myself towards that direction. I am capable of so many things and its not fair to consciously hurt myself by falling short of these things. Sounds like its go time. All I can do now is keep my eyes on the prize and dig for the strength to keep me going. I guess I will be making my first ever new years resolution. It will probably be more like a list, but its time to do what I have to do.

I haven't blogged in a really long time but our first day is coming to an end and i just wanted share some stuff with everyone. I could have tweeted all of this i guess but I'm not really sure about how data roaming works or if purchasing 50mb of data for the trip would be enough. If someone cares to enlighten me that would be appreciated. Right now I'm on airplane mode and connected with wifi, so I'm assuming its free. (thanks Alex I really hope were not wrong)On to the pictures....

We flew KLM and I had so much leg room on this flight it wasn't even funny. Window seat to sleep against + no one in the middle sleep made for a really comfortable 10hrs. I actually stayed awake for half of it and caught up on the Harry Potter movies.


One we landed we met up with our hosts Xavi and Sandra. They took us to grab some grub and see Barcelona. Here it is very common to have a couple tapas aka small appetizer like dishes for your entire meal. Shaun went with Cod fish and i had pizza.


This is the Plaza Spania. You might have seen it in a couple movies. Actually a lot of Barcelona looks like a movie set. FYI that stadium used to be a bull fighting ring, but they don't like the idea of killing the animals anymore so it's no longer allowed.


Here are 2 other random shots of stuff i saw in the city.




Last time we were here we actually drove around and saw a lot of the land marks and historical architecture and stuff. This time around they took us to a lot of boutiques, but neither of us bought anything. We saw a lot of good finds for expensive prices. Maybe well go back on the way out.






I honestly feel like there setups shit on our setups as far as floor plans, fixtures, visual elements etc. Some of this stuff was really cool to see.

This was the front of an H&M. Kinda looks like the set from the JT video.


Halloween maybe, or maybe a statement.


I light the lights. It makes everything seem way more important and expensive.



Elephant print elephant. LOL


The new customizable Nike sweater. It has a camera that faces out and to display your picture in the face of the sweater. Sick...


Sprite bottle chandelier. Idk...


One stop get fresh shop. Grab a new fit downstairs get your hair done upstairs...


These have t-shirts in them. Reminded me of Dr. Mario and that whack ass death streak perk that's like juggernaut.


On the way back to the car we saw some pretty cool and interesting stuff. The walking lights switch here in a matter of seconds. Imagine walking across the street then the light blinking three times and in about two seconds switching to red. We had to run across and get out of harms way about three times. Just like in the PI the drivers here don't give a shit about pedestrians.

This sign is at a majority of cross walks and basically says that one out of every three pedestrian accidents result in death. Crazy...


There are tons of these around the city. You basically rent them and ride around the whole day. I wanted to do it but it was late and i was kinda spooked about the signs on the floor about people dying.


Back down in the garage we saw this breathalyzer. Not a bad idea and I'm pretty jealous we don't have them at home. Stick some change in, grab a straw, blow into the hole, see if you can make it home or not.


That's all i have for now. I'll try to stay current with it and update at the end of everyday. We're supposed to go to a spa or something tomorrow morning then teach a class each during the day. At night i guess its a fiesta for all those who came out to take class. Later folks, and thanks for reading.

-Pat

Tokyo To Osaka

This one is for all the hipsters. (lol) 

You might remember a blog I did about my boy Shane Nesbit who owns and operates the San Mateo Zoo and the 48:18. Aside from cutting my hair every friday, good talks, shoe/clothing trades, and a legit source of music, he is also a big reason I got into riding my bike. This guy rides super hard, and has been riding fixed for like 6-7 years. Admit it, this is way before a lot of us newer riders even knew what a fixed gear track bike was. Long story short, he came up with a crazy idea to ride from Tokyo to Osaka (yes in Japan) and document it to create a short movie for the bicycle film festival. The ride will be an 8 day adventure covering over 350 miles from city to city. Absolutely nuts in my opinion, but it does sound like a lot of fun. Good luck and safe travels to Shane and the rest of the Tokyo To Osaka team.

Tokyo2Osaka.com

If you wanna check out the website they have put together click here.

Thats all I got.

-PAT

Beam Me Up Scotty

I don't remember the last time I went out and watched a movie at the theaters, but if I had to take a guess it might have been Yes Man. I usually don't go to the theaters because I'm actually really bothered by spending money on things I'm not sure about. The reason I don't bother to gamble in Vegas is the same reason I barely go to the movies. Maybe I'm alone on this, but I really hate that feeling of knowing I just wasted money on a bad movie. Especially when I could have just waited for it on netfliks or asked drew or mike to download it for me. On the other hand, when a movie is good it stays in my mind and actually effects my actions and decision for a long time. So I guess what I'm trying to say is go and watch Star Trek because you will not be disappointed. I feel like its right up there with Transformers, Iron Man, and even Batman. My dad is a big Trecky and I hated the TV shows, but the movie is definitely a must see.

Eye Spy Check List 

*caution, potential spoilers

- Harold and Kumar (yes i think Kumar is actually in it for a quick second)

- Spoks stance when he goes to get beamed the first time (i thought it was funny)

- The golden gate bridge (why they gotta drill in our town)

- Car scene when they first introduce little Kirk (cinematography was nuts)

- Hikaru  Sulu fight scene (he mistook "fencing" for being a ninja)

- Weird red creature thing in the snow (i honestly almost vomited in my mouth)

- An actual set in the movie (almost everything was CG or appeared to be)

Here are some other movies that I plan on paying for

That's all for now. Sorry it took so long, but I haven't been in the mood to think about my day, take pictures, blog, or putting anything down. Unfortunately for you, things are turning around and  Stellas helped my find the mojo. 

Ps. Juls, if you're reading this comment me the addy to your blog, I totally forgot what it was.

-PAT

Pac Man

You already know what time it is!!!

-PAT

El Wingadoro

My birthday month has officially started and I am counting down the days till I turn 23. Even with more than half of my life left to live, I definitely feel old. These are the years where I make or break my future. These years are the last of "being young" and all I can think about is how cool it would be to be back in high school where little mattered and anything was possible. It's time to grow up and although I am mentally and physically ready, deep down inside I really don't want to. To all the younger readers, take advantage of your youth and don't be so quick to act "grown."

In an effort to make up for how long my last blog was, I will try to make this as quick and to the point as possible. 

Woke up at 8:30 am for my friday haircut

When I got home my early bday gift to myself was on my door step

Chilled for the rest of the day doing various things on my mac

Met up with Bobs, Phil, Han, and Dre for Wingstop

Spent the rest of the night on COD 4

EYE CANDY

marbing surprised me with some of our favorite candies

cajun, garlic parmesan and lemon pepper (always all flats)

debating if i should eat that atomic

not a good idea

"it tastes like burning"

dre's bottom lip blistered from the atomic wings (served)

i told him i would post this picture so he wouldn't be embarrassed about the pic above

look at phil's pose in this picture

a closer look at the cleavage deep v neck (ewww)

vans 106 vulcanized and some active jeans

me and gelo at the top after some hardcore search and destroy

I'm getting tired of using iphone pics, but I can't get pictures off of my cannon and onto my mac since osx doesn't support the cd rom they gave me. If anyone know how I can get a disc that would work or any other ways around this problem, please let me know. Later days.

-PAT

Lazy Three Day Recap

I've been lagging lately, but I've also been staying busy. My hours of sleep have changed somewhat and I'm continually attempting to take advantage of my 24. The only problem with this is that instead of sleeping early and waking up early I have resorted to taking naps to catch up on the hours of sleep I've lost. It is definitely a work in progress. Fortunately for me, its a step in the right direction, unfortunately for you, this is going to be a really long blog.

Tuesday was like any other tuesday minus a random trip to San Jose. After I taught my usual class me and Aggie headed over to SJ to dance a little with the "SJ Chapter." (no they are not a new group) Unfortunately we went to the wrong Ballys Total Fitness and got lost on the way to the right one. By the time we got there we only had an hour left to session. It's pretty difficult dancing over there because I for one am not used to how hot it gets. Maybe I'm over exaggerating, but I really felt like it was really hot in that studio. Anyway the rest of the night was spent eating hyped up burritos at Steez and Cleo's apartment (not APT) and watching random shit on youtube. We left around 3am and I was finally home by 4am, which is why I missed blogging that night. Shout out to Ryan, Subi, Cleo, (sometimes)  Steez (sometimes) and Jeka (sometimes) for taking on that drive two or more times a week. You are crazy for that and I appreciate the dedication.

Wednesday was pretty typical as well. Missed a meet up with Aggie earlier in the day due to my nap and eventually got to WSPA by 5pm. Worked with mom for our kids final rehearsal before their competition. Did the same with APT later that night. Finished of the night with a session since me and Aggie missed our first one. Those Japanese folks really made me question myself as a dancer and I'm glad I'm back into grind mode like I was about 5 years ago when everything was so fresh and new to me. When I had nothing to show for myself, and when all I wanted to do was get really good. I eventually made it home around 12am and finished off the night with some COD4. It was my first time back in a long time so I played till about 4am. I was super tired after and went straight to bed instead of blogging. 

Thursday was pretty much spent at WSPA teaching and rehearsing with The Company. Subi taught a ridiculous piece and Carlyne, Aggie, and Regalado made me a pancake/waffle thing. Thanks guys. Honestly I'm getting tired so I'm gonna end this here. 

EYE CANDY

2029 capitol express way

i swear its extra hot in there

sj chapter

la vic's

they're way strict about the refills

loose roll+whack carne asada+not enough sour cream and cheese = c+ at best

they only good thing about that spot

the sj room mates, steez and cleo

i'm back in it (gt:pottycakes)

waffle pancake thing that i didn't even end up eating

That's all for now.

-PAT

Bullet Your Face

Not really feeling good today so I'll keep this short. 

The workshop on Sunday was dope. 

- Our biggest turn out

- Jay through down a really good routine 

- I felt like I was able connected to the class in a different way than usual through my routine

- Shaun killed it as always

- Everyone (Camp/guests) had a good time

- I got to meet a lot of new dancers

- It was good to see familiar faces

- THE SHIT KINGZ (click)

- I was inspired (and you know how I feel about that word)

Today was super lazy since I didn't feel well.

- Laid in bed and slept for a majority of the day (sorry for not picking up phone calls)

- Hours I was awake and coherent were spent reading blogs and browsing the web

- Attempted to purchase custom Vans but realized I wouldn't be around to receive them on the intended shipping date (fail)

- When I started to feel better I cleaned my room

- Now I'm back in bed looking forward to more sleep 

EYE CANDY

the cover for my next rap album

the company and the shit kingz

words can not explain how much talent these four poses 

(i think they're creatures from another planet in human bodies)

maybe i can send to carlyne's house

Tomorrow is a new day. Hopefully I will spend it doing things I have intended to do with my new out look on 24hrs. Good night.

-PAT

It's Go Time

This blog has made me realize that I need to be more productive with the 24 hours I am given each day. In all honesty I envy those who are able to sleep at a decent hour and wake up to see the sunrise. These people have the whole day ahead of them to do whatever they want or need to do. Sure at times this can be stressful and tiring, but in the end it is these people who are getting the most out of their 24 hours. The reason I'm blogging about this is because there isn't much to recap in a blog when you've only been up for half of those hours and only half of that half was spent even doing anything. Don't get me wrong. We all need those "lazy days" but they have turned into a norm for me instead of a pleasure. There is a part of me that understands why I've been so lazy lately. With nothing to do but dance and work, (dance) then why shouldn't I sleep all day and get plenty hours of rest. On the other hand I also realize that there are only a few things I need to do, but there is so much more out there I can be doing. Something needs to be done, and I'm ready to make a change. 

On a lighter note Shaun is back in town and like always things related to dance seem to feel better. (no homo) I don't want to say that I am inspired when he is here, because I do feel like that word has turned into a cliche and is used a little to freely. With that said I guess I will say that I'm definitely more motivated when he's around. Take advantage, I know that I will. Its go time.

EYE CANDY

dancers on a heroes tip (im excited)

Thats all for now.

ps. The polls have spoken and I guess Ryan will be needing a sleeping bag for his camp out.

-Pat

Operation Gotchabitch

I've learned that the best way to stay consistent with this thing is to blog every night. If I miss one day it turns into two and that eventually turns into months. I did miss last night however, but I'm back again to night in an effort to keep the momentum going.

Although I had every intention to blog last night I was unable to since I left my mac book charger at WSPA after teaching. What's even more unfortunate, is that I wasn't able to get it back today because the janitor took it. For all those Camp folks that have lost something at the studio, I feel your pain. In an effort to get our stuff back I have drawn up, "operation gotchabitch." We are basically going to set up a camera, or have Ryan camp out for the night (i haven't made up my mind yet) while we entice the janitor with something really valuable like an incase backpack with a macbook, ipod, iphone, and cables/chargers in it. Once he takes the bate we will either confront him with the footage or have Ryan pop out and yell "gotchabitch!" Which would you prefer? (vote to the right) If he doesn't give us our stuff back because he's a lier or he's sold our shit on ebay, we will then rip off his toenails and pee on his naked toes while he's forced to chew on light bulbs with fire red ants in them. (yea, i get down like that)

So back to my point for even deciding to blog in the first place. Its important to keep the momentum going and to do so here are some ups to cancel the downs caused by a lack of heat and sun for the past few days. 

UPS

- Pat x Mom choreography is looking really good (come check it out at IDC 5/3)

- APT is continually impressing me with their ability to pick up my stuff

- Baboos friend is getting me a new charger with 25% off

- The Company is steady grinding and getting the job done

- Shaun is coming tomorrow

- This blog is actually inspiring others to start blogging again

EYE CANDY

Ok, keep it real I haven't taken a picture since the Giants game, but i will leave you with this. (thank me later)

click here

If you don't have at least 4mins. and 2sec. of fun with this thing, then there is something seriously wrong with you. Thats all for now. Later bitches....

-PAT

Be There Or Be An L 7 Weenie

This sunday (4/26) we are throwing our "end of the month workshop." If you have been there before, you know what kind of fun you're getting yourself into. If you haven't, your definitely missing out. Be there or be square.

Click here for more info.

ps. peep the price change

-PAT